In my March column for Golf Course Industry, I’ve written about honest-to-goodness, real-life questions and statements asked of superintendents….and invited you to share some of your own.

You can’t make this stuff up…how many of these have you heard?

“What time is the 9:00 o’clock shotgun tomorrow?”

“My member-guest partner packed in a hurry but forgot to bring any underwear. Could you run down the mall and pick up some for him? He’s a size 40.”

“We know there’s a no-cell-phone policy at the club, but we also know that you have one provided by the club. Can we use your phone to order lunch and call our offices?”

Now it’s your turn! What are some of the darnedest things you’ve heard around the game of golf?